The First Day

Three indelible moments in time now, seared into my mind

*****
The First

She, half-turning in her front passenger seat to face me in the rear seat, her hair undone, streaming with wild abandon down over her shoulders, her eyes on mine.

Her eyes : filled with that strange, infinite, yet gentle sadness, somehow still encouraging, and forgiving.

*****
The Second

She, lying on the bed as I stood at the foot of it, gasping for breath, gasping, just gasping. All words exhausted now, all anger spent; all doors closed. There was nothing left to do, nothing left to say. Her brow furrowed in agony, her eyes on mine.

Her eyes : streaming, wet, filled with pain and darkness, and perhaps hatred, perhaps fear, perhaps other dark emotions I won't guess at, silently voicing what her lips were about to say.

*****
The Third

She, a dark, vaguely blue and grey striped silhouette in my car leaning forwards across the divide, her forehead on my sternum, my hands clasping the back of her head, clasping the hair bunched up at the back of her head, holding her forearm; feeling the droplets splattering one by one onto my forearm, left, then right, and feeling them turn cold as we sat in silence.

Her eyes : I couldn't even see her eyes. And yet the moment burnt in. How?.